I wrote this in February of 2019 on my old blog. Thought I’d share it here so you can learn a little bit more about my recent journey.
Leaving San Francisco in 2015 after two years was the right thing to do. (See last week’s issue) But I left with reservations and remorse.
The first time I visited I was in my twenties. Just like Tony B., the city stole my heart.
Cheryl and I visited our Cleveland friend, Steve, who had moved out there for a new job. He showed us all the sights. Lombard Street, the Wharf, the Golden Gate Bridge. In Chinatown, we went to a restaurant where sushi rolls floated by on boats.
Years later, G took me back when he had to travel for work. We stayed in Redwood City and I toured around while he worked. I found Jamba Juice and saw my first IKEA. I had what probably was my last hurrah in a used CD store (remember those?) I bought an Everything But the Girl CD, Amplified Heart.
G and I kept going back and honeymooned there, five days in the city, five days in Healdsburg in wine country.
When we had a chance to live there, we took it. We had a four-bedroom house in Ann Arbor and three cars in the driveway. We moved to an 825-square foot apartment in the SOMA neighborhood, near Oracle Park. G took the MUNI to work and walked home along the Bay.
And oh, the restaurants! Slanted Door, House of Prime Rib, Swan Oyster Depot, Tacolicious, Greens, Tartine, The Mill, Delfina, Nopalito, Burma Superstar.
So many visitors! G’s dad and stepmom, G’s mom and aunt, my friends, Cheryl, Sarika, and Venessa. But not my mom.
Mom hated that I left Michigan. We Facetime’d all the time. I told her how much fun I was having. I told her about my new friends. I told her about my adventures exploring the city. I told her she should come out and visit.
She wanted no part of it. Less than six months in California, I made plans to come back to Michigan to see her, but they fell through. She didn’t talk to me for months.
I remember thinking that my dad would’ve loved the fact that we moved to San Francisco. He would’ve been cheerleading the move and making plans to visit ASAP. But Mom? I could never reconcile how she could be so upset with me when I was the happiest I’d ever been.
Mom cooled off and started calling again. Then a few months later, she found out about the cancer. I flew back to Michigan several times and then G and I made the move to Florida. Everything was a blur after that for a long time.
In early 2019, I had a chance for a solo mission and returned to the city that had been a big part of my adult life. I visited some favorite hangouts, the old neighborhood, and saw my friends. Mostly, I gave the city a proper goodbye.
First stop: Blue Bottle Coffee.
Our old building. We had a MUNI stop, Philz Coffee, and a library branch across the street.
The requisite cable car.
I treated myself to lunch at Zuni Cafe.
My beloved Ferry Building.
Then it was time to go. I’d reclaimed my heart and took it back home.
Thanks again for reading! I care about you. Please don’t forget to eat your greens.
***Written to Everything But the Girl’s, Amplified Heart.
What a beautiful homage to your Soul- City. Happy to go back with you anytime m! Need to try that place where sushi floats by on boats!
Saying goodbye to a city is one of the most bittersweet and important things to do. This made me so emotional. It was beautiful xo