I wrote this in September of 2015 on my old blog. Thought I’d share it here so you can learn a little bit more about my recent journey.
September 2015
We just moved to Naples, FL from San Francisco, CA. Culture shock, to say the least.
I thought I'd put some words to this move and explain our decision. This blog does have the word diary in its title after all.
G introduced his idea to move to Florida around Thanksgiving in 2014. He had a list of good reasons because he is my G. Logical, organized, strategic.
I wasn't ready to listen though because first I was heartbroken about leaving SF. I was heartbroken through Christmas and sunny, beautiful January and February. I wasn't able to actually discuss this idea with G until April. And I wasn't able to discuss it with my dear ones until June. I just didn't want to say it out loud because it really would be a plan. It would be real.
SF and I were like peas and carrots. Organic, farm raised, peas and carrots. I had always wanted to try being a city girl and I took to it right away. I loved living in a high rise with a 24-hour concierge desk. I loved not having a car and walking everywhere. I loved being by the bay. I loved the weather...hardly reaching 70 most of the time. Jeans, a blouse, a cardigan and good walking shoes being my daily wardrobe. I loved volunteering at the farm market on Saturdays at the world famous Ferry Building. I loved having Napa and Sonoma practically in my backyard. I loved discovering that SF was a coffee city and I was highly caffeinated throughout my stay. Needless to say, I loved the food scene in SF. Three words: to die for.
I loved walking into a yarn store my first month in the city and ultimately finding some lifelong friends. Clementine, Rachel, and Emily, you rule and I love you.
The headline news was that I finally found some help and guidance for my anxiety and depression issues that weren't diagnosed until I was in my late 30's. My time in SF was all about me learning how to cope, learning how to forgive, learning how to mourn, learning how to breathe. Learning how to be myself again, but a newer, and hopefully better, version.
So back to G's proposed plan for moving to FL. I'm going to use bullet points because that's what he would do.
Mom's health and parents that routinely spend time in FL
Cost of living
Travel
Relaxing environment
In the summer of 2014, Mom was diagnosed with cholangiocarcinoma, a rare form of cancer of the bile ducts. The poor thing has had a few surgeries and procedures, major fixes, minor setbacks, you name it. Through it all, she has been a champ. She and my stepdad have been wintering in FL for years now. Spending time together here in FL will be much easier than being all the way on the West Coast. G has family here in FL and his parents have all started to spend time down here on the Gulf Coast as well.
Our SF lease was up this month. The leasing company wanted to raise our rent 23%. That's when G's plan went into high gear. He had had enough. We lived in an 875 sq. ft. one bedroom apartment. We had no cars. And SF still priced us out.
Living in SF was a dream come true. But we have more dreams. Moving here to FL allows us to save money and travel again. Our tenth anniversary is around the corner and France might be a doable option with more money in the bank and flights across the pond instead of across the US and then across the pond.
Finally, G found out he is not a city guy. The food scene, the coffee scene, the wine scene, yes. The noise, the pollution, the crowds, the public transportation...not his bag. Whenever G came to visit family in FL, he loved it here. He loved the pace, the vacation vibe, the beach and water nearby. The quiet. He loved the simplicity of being here.
So here we are. In Florida. With room for guests, a screened-in lanai, and air conditioning.
G has taken to this like I took to SF. Now it's my turn to try and get used to this new reality.
May 2022
Mom took a turn for the worse late 2015. She somehow managed to visit us in our new place in Naples. She spent a week with us on her own. I don’t know how she did it. She hated flying. She’d hardly traveled on her own anywhere. And I’m pretty sure she knew that she didn’t have a lot of time left. When she flew back to Michigan, she was in the hospital three days later. Then hospice. She passed away in December. We never had more time together in Florida.
We lived in Naples for three years. Then, G got a new job that moved us to Illinois. Three more moves after that, we found ourselves back in Naples in early 2021.
We never found our groove when we left Naples and now we’re back in our preferred groove. They call it the Paradise Coast and that’s not wrong. Everywhere you look there’s beauty. My dermatologist just told me that Southwest Florida is not the best place for my pale, Irish skin. My response: “You’re absolutely right. Sunscreen and hats and SPF clothing are my best friends. But Southwest Florida is best for my brain and heart.”
This place is not a mecca for food. For yarn. For coffee. But that’s not why I’m here. And that’s what travel adventures are for.
(Newsflash! Since we moved away the first time, a new coffee shop opened. I finally had a chance to go there last month. OK, let’s be honest. I was brave enough to go out and explore new places for the first time since lockdown. I had the best cup of coffee I’ve had in Naples. Thank you, Philip, at Narrative Coffee Roasters! I will be back.)
So we’re settling in. My lanai is once again my happy place. G and I can calm down here and find peace after so much upheaval, after lockdown, after waves of grief.
Thanks again for reading! I care about you. Please don’t forget to eat your greens.
***Written to Bonnie Raitt’s Just Like That…
And I’ve loved visiting all those beautiful places and being able to explore them with you! Many discoveries like the food kind, I’ve been able to carry over into my own boring Ohio home!😁
As a person who is highly averse to moving, I'm in awe of how many times you've done it. B and I used to travel to Florida (Stuart) every winter for a few years though I don't really count that as 'moving' as such. I loved my winters there and they represent a time when life felt infinitely less cluttered -- can you believe we drove from Canada to Florida WITHOUT A CELL PHONE?!?! Imagine!?!?! I miss the fresh fish and happy hours.....Margherita (sp?) Mondays at Dos Amigos, oysters and mussels and .... yeah, good times.